I thought you all should know how I really feel . . . . . .
just because you're special and you are my friend.

When you are sad . . . . . .
I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the scum sucking bastard who made you sad.

When you are scared . . . . . .
I will laugh at you and tease you about it every chance I get.

When you are worried . . . . . .
I will tell you how much worse it could be and to quit complaining.

When you are confused . . . . . .
I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass.

When you are sick . . . . . .
I will hold your hair while you pay homage to the porcelain god.

When you fall . . . . . .
I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

This is my oath . . . . . . I pledge till the end.